Returning Home

ZeroZero returned to their second home to check out the score. As usual, some silly happenings occured... and as per usual, everyone involved was particularly masho.

Overview of our second visit to this fabled place

Brief guide to some good Chonging places

Quotes that we can remember

Overview of the Dam

This guide is part two of our comprehensive guide to living it 'high' in the Dam. Here are some new observations and discoveries we made:

CoffeeShop 36 has turned into a hangout for poofs - the gear is pretty weak, and the music is really crap. The management had the cheek to tell us that music made by none other than Reindeer of Doom was too 'hard and dark' for the other smokers. We asked them to put on a track because we had dedicated a track to CoffeeShop 36. Then they turn us away with some crap gear and a wack excuse. Very poor. This is not to say that CS36 is crap - it simply has gone downhill. It still sells hemp-chocolate milk, and has some games to play. Still a chill place.

American tourists are mental...nothing new here.

There's still a surplus of "Crrrrck" that people are well up for selling you. Avoid. Remember, ZeroZero doesn't ever take drugs, so neither should you!

Fuckwits from Rickmansworth need to be boxed if they try and punk you. If you see someone from Rickmansworth wandering around your Hotel, looking like a battered member of Club Jaques, then don't try and buy anything illegal off him, and beat they punk ass.

We went to the Hotel Centrum, a bit run down and pikey, but friendly and with a pub underneath. Amsterdam
was a bit too weak for serious sessions at this time of year though.

ZeroZero awards the following products a badge of honour:

    Cannabia                         -   A very special hemp beer which has a really crisp taste.
    Stophoest                        - Only the very best Dutch sweets for ZeroZero!
    Brainwash energy drink -   Canes you up severly, and also staines your teeth and clothes for days...
    Metabolic Activators      -   Buy these from Conscious Dreams : the perfect combination of thousands of
                                                  vitamins and things like that you keep you caning it up all day long!

Herbwise, you should be checking for these special friends:

    Nepalese - The real shit, not wack fake shit from Smokey Joes. Make sure that this stuff is pretty soft when
                       cold, and is completely black in colour. One spliff of Nepalese should knock anyone out for a
                       while. The quality of Nepalese does vary. The best we bought was from the Greenhouse effect.
    Sensi Hash - Mad shit from The Wall coffeeshop. Basically bade from compressed skunk that's been turned
                          into a fine powder. This would be the best souvenir from the Dam.
    Black Bombay - Well strong and hardcore. A decent price, and a consistency not disimilar to Red Seal but
                                certainly much stronger.
    Orange Bud - Always a good breed. You simply can't go wrong with this breed. Consistently strong and cerebral.
    Afghani - Still strong and potent...always a good deal, particularly for 6 guilders a gram.

CoffeeShops of Honour:

The Wall - A low budget bargain basement. If you want some decent gear, and a chilled but quiet place then
come here. The best company is provided by a cat so stoned it barely moves and inch, and simply streches
every hour or so. The pool tables are downstairs, but the Dutch use a retardadly big white ball.

Sensi Seeds - Quite a cosmopolitan hideout. This place is run by a rather un-mashed lady who is quite friendly,
but far too excitable. (Mind you, some chumps had thrown up all over this ladies cushions, so maybe she can
chill sometimes <skin up>). They also love their 100s of skin packets, but they don't sell the packets singly...a bit silly really. The Cannabia here is a very dark and satisfying tase, just the right compliment to a stiff skunk bombaras.

Quotes of Doom:

"You should go to Club Paradiso! They play that song which goes "come and touch your pussies - PUSSIEES - Now you lady! Now!" Lots of ladies and girls..."<The bloke then ran into our hotel as we quickly left>

"You're going to see 10 to 15 couples...you're going to see the banana show; we've got melons tonight as well!....Hey you Lady! Have you had a good joint?"

"Can I skin up?" <a microsecond of silence then:> "Yes."

"Pleeeeeeeeaaaasssseeeee - pleeeease don't make me smoke any more skunk..."

"I'm from America - I don't want to rob you or sell you drugs... I just want to skank some of your dollars!"

Remember boys and girls - don't ever take drugs. ZeroZero doesn't even know the meaning of the word 'mashed' - make sure you don't either!